Day Four:
The biggest adjustment I've had to make is:
The biggest (and hardest) adjustment I’ve had to make since my diagnosis is a reduction in activity. I was always athletic growing up. I was the fit little skinny girl, and I loved playing sports. I played basketball and soccer, I swam, and I rode horses. I was always energetic, and I ran everywhere. Even in the classroom, I would bound from one end to another, constantly running and hopping about. In middle school I loved gym class, to the point where I took PE enrichment as an optional class so I could do more sports between classes. I grew a passion for horseback riding, and proved to be a talented rider. I jumped horses, and especially loved riding bareback.
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| Me and my beloved horse, Scooter. We went for a nice bareback gallop in the pasture. This horse is the love of my life. |
I still managed to remain active while in
high school, even when I was experiencing pain or on my period. It was after I
turned 18 and my symptoms worsened that my activity level began to decline. I
still rode my horse, as he is the love of my life and to me riding is like
therapy. I skied in the winter, though I was worried of falling after I had been
diagnosed with a tennis ball sized ovarian cyst. I started to find myself
getting very sore and tired after physical activity. In July 2011 I ended up in
the ER after a weekend of hiking in the mountains.
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| This photo was taken a day or two before I ended up in the ER in Fernie, B.C. I was clutching my belly because I was in a considerable amount of pain after we went hiking. |
Pelvic adhesions make it difficult for me
to move. I’ve lost some mobility in my left leg, and chronic pain associated
with a co-morbid condition makes it so my abdominal muscles are always
extremely tight. The nerves are always firing, so I’m uncomfortable at best
while walking and running.
I’ve watched as my lack of activity and
aggressive hormone treatments have made me put on weight. I went from being
between 100/110lbs to over 120lbs. In all honesty I’ve been having more and
more meltdowns regarding my physical appearance (I lost it when I found I could
no longer fit into my size 0 Guess jeans). When I was younger I was always “the
skinny girl”. The compliments I got were regarding my body, so losing that part
of myself has been incredibly difficult. I feel ugly and fat and I hate getting
dressed in the morning because of my weight gain.
Recently I tried taking up yoga. I’ve been
so fed up with how I look that I decided enough
is enough. Though I found that practicing yoga is painful, and caused me to
have bloody bathroom visits. I am now awaiting a colonoscopy to try to find out
why that is.
In addition to losing my athleticism, I’ve
had to adjust to frequent doctors’ appointments, surgeries, and so many ultrasounds oh my god!
accurate depiction of me trying to do yoga:
I’ve tried adjusting my diet, as I’ve
learned what my “trigger foods” are. I find that my bowel endo flares
considerably when I eat red meat. Buh-bye steaks. I live in Alberta. We are
famous for our beef. This has been a rough adjustment. I’ve also had to reduce
the amount of dairy I have in my diet. When I was a teenager I assumed that I
was lactose intolerant, as I would feel very ill and sore after consuming
dairy. Now I’ve learned that I can have milk and cheese, but just in small
amounts. A lot of the time women with endometriosis are misdiagnosed with
irritable bowel syndrome. Endometriosis can cause a number of food
sensitivities and can cause digestive upsets.
So in terms of the biggest adjustment I’ve
had to make, apart from more doctors visits and diet changes, I’ve had to let
go of part of who I am. I have gone from athletic horseback rider to
chronically ill couch potato. Endometriosis, you sure are a charmer.
Thanks everyone for reading! Make sure to come back tomorrow. And feel free to comment! :)
